Joe Biden was supposed to enter the Presidential race at any moment.
But his life just changed forever.
That’s because this one sex scandal from Joe Biden’s past will leave you speechless.
For years, Joe Biden was known on the right as “creepy Uncle Joe.”
There were countless photos from public events of Biden putting his hands on women in a manner that many Americans deemed inappropriate.
But the fake news media ignored this disturbing behavior.
Biden served for eight years as Barack Obama’s Vice President, so fake news reporters swept his groping under the rug.
But now that Biden is thinking of running for President, he will be in direct competition with the socialist and identity politics candidates championed by the fake news media.
That’s why Biden went from hero to poster child of predatory white-male privilege overnight.
Nevada State representative Lucy Flores penned an essay describing how Biden kissed her and smelled her hair without her consent at an event in 2014.
As I was taking deep breaths and preparing myself to make my case to the crowd, I felt two hands on my shoulders. I froze. “Why is the vice-president of the United States touching me?”
I felt him get closer to me from behind. He leaned further in and inhaled my hair. I was mortified. I thought to myself, “I didn’t wash my hair today and the vice-president of the United States is smelling it. And also, what in the actual fuck? Why is the vice-president of the United States smelling my hair?” He proceeded to plant a big slow kiss on the back of my head. My brain couldn’t process what was happening. I was embarrassed. I was shocked. I was confused. There is a Spanish saying, “tragame tierra,” it means, “earth, swallow me whole.” I couldn’t move and I couldn’t say anything. I wanted nothing more than to get Biden away from me. My name was called and I was never happier to get on stage in front of an audience.
Biden’s Presidential rivals provided him no cover.
Both Elizabeth Warren and Joaquin Castro told reporters that Flores should be believed.
Warren went further and hinted that Biden shouldn’t even get in the race.
When reporters asked Warren if this scandal should disqualify Biden, she said it was up to him to decide if he wanted to run or not.
Within 48 hours, Biden released a statement responding to the allegations and attempted to salvage his Presidential ambitions.
The former Vice President wrote:
“In my many years on the campaign trail and in public life, I have offered countless handshakes, hugs, expressions of affection, support and comfort and not once – never – did I believe I acted inappropriately. If it is suggested I did so, I will listen respectfully. But it was never my intention. I may not recall these moments the same way, and I may be surprised at what I hear but we have arrived at an important time when women feel they can and should relate their experiences, and men should pay attention. And I will. I will also remain the strongest advocate I can be for the rights of women I will fight to build on the work I’ve done in my career to end violence against women and ensure women are treated with the equality they deserve. I will continue to surround myself with trusted women advisers who challenge me to see different perspectives than my own and I will continue to speak out on these vitally-important issues where there is much more progress to be made and crucial fights that must be waged and won.”
Biden’s attempted clean-up may be too little, too late.
“Creepy Uncle Joe” will move from right-wing meme into mainstream punchline.
This will define his candidacy.
And it could keep him out of the race entirely.
We will keep you up to date on any new developments in this ongoing story.